Wasn't what I planned, Still Good

             It took me a while emotionally to write this post. We moved back into our house three weeks ago and  I was not all bubbly and excited or kissing the walls, like I felt I was supposed to be . I was happy to be moving out of the fifth wheel but  I was really overwhelmed and to be honest disappointed. I like to be honest on my blog. If I'm lying on here there really is no point to it so it took me a while to write because I needed some perspective...and the pinterest pin that goes with that is..

      The renters moved out on a weekend which had us slowly moving in all week long. The kids and I started unpacking and it was kind've  like shopping at your favorite garage sale. I say it like that, because a lot of the stuff I saved was sentimental. It's still kind've crap, but its our crap. The toys the kids packed away 3 years ago are more age appropriate for their younger sibling, so that's been pretty convenient. All of our family  portraits are taken Pre Waylon so I haven't hung up any pictures yet. I unpacked my beloved Fiesta ware plates, which I really missed. I discovered how long silverware drawers really are! It is  mind blowing! I found the most enormous Pyrex ever . I think its actually a standard casserole dish 9 x 11 but I forgot how huge they are! I am amazed at how quickly dinner is cooking, and I forget that I can have more than one burner on. It took everyone a while to get use to the ease of lighting the oven, y'all just turn it on? You don't have to get out a lighter ? I had to give the kids instructions. It's like they forgot how to live in a house. It's shocking really . Waylon calls it the green house.( It is by the way green. ) The bathtub has been a huge upgrade for him. My kids seem quieter now that we have more room. They just chill out. I'm trying to teach them how to use a backyard. I keep telling them to go out there. Their response is " and do what?" They have been playing hide and seek inside. Because our 1,000 square feet has all sorts of nooks and crannies to their young eyes. I'm sure you've been waiting for me to tell you that I once again have my very own washer and dryer and it is frickin AMAZING!


On one hand we are all excited to be in a house and on the other hand, the kids are all still in one room, which is not what I wanted. People keep asking me if I am so happy to be back in a house and I am ....but it's still not the amount of space I was dreaming of. When I put stuff away and it's all going in the same spot , I feel like I never left and it's creepy. Twilight zone creepy. Like the past three years were an elaborate dream. I know that sounds crazy....but its true. I really didn't think we would be coming back to the same house. I thought we were going to keep it as a rental. I thought a bigger rental would have popped up sooner for us to move into. I thought housing prices might stay lower and we could buy again. I just thought things would be different once we got to this point. Things are not bad either.  I look around and see so many blessings and the biggest ones are my children's smiley faces but it took me a while to accept that my expectations were not going to happen how I thought they should. How many times on this journey has my life not gone as planned? How long is it going to take me to really stop fighting that,  because I have really been fighting it this year. I think this is a  big moment for me and I'm trying to really accept that God's plan is greater than Kristina's plan. Cuz let me tell you, I got plans.

my new mantra?

     A few things we realized we didn't have packed that we thought we did.... silverware. I guess we brought it all with us. I left it in the fifth wheel for camping so we had to buy more silverware. A toaster. I have been promising my kids a toaster. Looking back I should've put one in the trailer, but it was just one more thing taking up space which was so valuable. I have never seen kids so happy to have bagels and eggo waffles before. I might have actually deprived my children.                A microwave. In our rush to move out of the house, I have no idea what we did with our microwave. A television. We had 2 TVs. One we put in our first trailer and then sold it. The other went to storage. If you have a TV in storage, I have bad news. If it's not a temperature regulated storage, your TV might break. We had a long week without television this summer. I'm sure my kids will start blogging about these conditions we parent them in soon!
    
  Then we have homeowner problems. The first one is storage. Storage has always been an issue in this house. We have one linen closet, so I'm not sure what to do with all of our bedding. I can always use those Space bags that I used in the trailer but I was really  hoping to leave those behind. I just don't want to see them ever again, is that asking too much? We had to buy shelves. I have no idea how we managed without shelves before or a bookcase. That was remedied this weekend with an Ikea trip. Did you know I have been to Ikea in California, Utah and Colorado. pretty special huh?

the kids game room

         I've had a few great moments in the house so far. On July 3rd Oceanside has an early Independence day  firework show. We were doing our normal stuff. Kids were in the living room, I was washing dishes, when all of a sudden we had an amazing view for the fireworks from our kitchen window. Waylon is under the impression that this is a normal occurrence and has been waiting for more fireworks by the window.      Another really cool thing is a space we have in our garage that Ian made a little room out of. It use to be an office, but  we turned it  into a game room for the kids. Except it is still the most quietest place of the house so I am constantly sneaking down there to nap or read. They usually find me pretty quick. But I love it down there, you can always hear birds chirping.

       We've also had a few mishaps. We were about to  sit down to our 4th of July dinner, when Ian tried to adjust the sinks water pressure. Never mess with plumbing before a meal. The valve broke off in his hand and we had to turn off the water to the house. No big deal for us. We've gone without water right? I think we've been to Home Depot every other day.Some times twice a day.  Then the kids told us that they saw a mouse, twice. I insisted that they were seeing lizards, which we have a lot of.     Nope .     At Tuesday's dinner , our mousey friends made an appearance, which again sent us off to Home Depot. Ian caught two and I could tell he wanted me to be impressed but I really wanted to scream into a pillow. Because EWWWW. Haven't had any since, but still.

          Have you ever heard of the six word memoir challenge?  The idea is to sum up your life in six words, to find the essence of your story. I think mine is something like, "Wasn't what I planned, still good. "   That most certainly might've been stolen from the Internet, because that phrase floats in my head but it doesn't sound like me. There have been so many transitions in our live. Especially  in the past three years and I really just want to be done transitioning. Maybe that's the lesson that I was suppose to be learning. If change is the only constant, maybe learning how to accept the transitions is my life long mission.

this is worth posting twice xo